I’m back in Barnsley now… Leaving Dufton, and back into Darton. Back on the heel of the hills I have spent six months in. Well, not quite. This area of the North Pennines is its own place, not really comparable even to other parts of the so-called ‘backbone of England’. I find it hard toContinue reading “My last day in Dufton”
Category Archives: Writing
What to do? In this city, in this world
Edited version of text originally posted in Autumn 2016. I got the express train across the pennines. I’ve always wanted to reach the Metropolis on the other side, only to repeatedly realise it’s no lost world, no place where things are done differently, after all. “What spurs me on to travel to other towns andContinue reading “What to do? In this city, in this world”
What I could have been doing right now.
As of 13 October 2023, I should have been just starting a PHD – right now. In Autumn 2022 was just in the final stages of submitting the proposal to the University of Leeds. The proposal would be unconditionally accepted, but the idea began to fall apart in early 2023, when I was trying toContinue reading “What I could have been doing right now.”
December 2003
“You wanna go home”; a stirring moment in a song by Pulp defines my wish as I hover around a confectionary store between my train connections. But home has long since merely been an idea, indefinitely dislocated by the dread and anxiety that pursues me. I gave in, badly today. Binge eaten on Flapjack, aboutContinue reading “December 2003”
I hate to say I told me so
To relapse into my pre-2015 premonitions. The rise of what felt like a workable hope in-between 2015 and 2019, now mysteriously absent. But the way things are accelerating at the moment it feels like it has been wiped from history altogether and we are at the the other end of line of reality stitched backContinue reading “I hate to say I told me so”
My imaginary past as a ‘noughties’ indie star
(Part of a series of ‘Noughties’ excavations that will eventually be worked into a much larger project). I’ve been a doing a lot of ‘unearthing’ of late, most likely because I turn 40 in around 3 months. I’ve been trying to do a bit of excavation and salvaging of works and creative former selves, thatContinue reading “My imaginary past as a ‘noughties’ indie star”
October 1999 ( my first Great resignation)
I walk down Eastgate, and cross Regents Street, towards the back road down to the bus station. It’s a grey October, and I’m porous to this greyness. Any deeper colours are reserved to the warm cosy culture of comedown 90s TV. It’s like the decade has put its winter coat and gloves on – takingContinue reading “October 1999 ( my first Great resignation)”
The Return of the 00s
“The turn that events took had all the look of some kind of ritual assassination. The killing not of a body – the body was already dead – but of a name.” – Mark Fisher, ‘The Return of the 70’s’ from Ghosts of my Life. The turn of events Mark Fisher was referring to inContinue reading “The Return of the 00s”
20 year of coffees and Train tickets to nowhere in particular
“If only this next journey unveils something.” Chasing the idea. An idea that The idea might finally manifest itself. Chasing it for 20 years. The infamous accusation aimed at Millennials is that they can’t afford their own homes because they spend all their money on avocado on toast – a distorted presentation of reality, so to ignoreContinue reading “20 year of coffees and Train tickets to nowhere in particular”
Do we need ‘The New Deal’ for sex?
“How the fuck do you know if that’s in your head or not?” Prez Pryzbylewski, The Wire. Before I even begin to scrawl these admittedly conceptually disjointed thoughts, I realise I could be acting recklessly. I, in no way, intend to speak in favour of abusers, but such grey areas of consideration must now beContinue reading “Do we need ‘The New Deal’ for sex?”
John B Ledger 