Category Archives: stories from forgotten space

A Uk bank holiday in 2024

HEAD HELD DOWN Negativity isn’t a perception of a world outside, it’s a projection of that world inside: how you feel about yourself, as you continually manoeuvre the inner furniture, trying to feel at home. This reminder gives you rest-bite from the habit of being hard on yourself. But it splutters and withers as youContinue reading “A Uk bank holiday in 2024”

The waste that calls your name

If everything up here is exposed, then this bleached landscape is the necessary negative of the urban spaces below where addiction has become the modus operandi; where every stone is upturned, leaving no secrets, no mystery, no object to desire, just short circuits to quick fixes. “Everyone’s a junky”. If the wasteland calls you forth,Continue reading “The waste that calls your name”

The ascent (Black Hill)

Where do you go when the direction, momentum, you indirectly, but nonetheless wholeheartedly placed your future state of being within, dissolves into thin air, and you see nothing in front of you? You go sideways. Westwards. Up here…scouring for answers. The moors are plural. One moor is every moor. But the Moors is a stateContinue reading “The ascent (Black Hill)”

The waiting room for life

Welcome to The waiting room for life. Here you will face mortality without actually being alive. You will become a living ghost, watching other people live out their lives. Acts of apparent self-destruction, reckless moments, are acts of desperation – having tried every other option to get out, but to no avail, destructiveness becomes instinctive.Continue reading “The waiting room for life”

A Lifetime’s Worth of Staring at Train Announcement Boards

[Edited post originally from New Years’ 2016] A morning I had a dream last night. I can’t even remember what it was about, but to be honest the fact I know I had a dream is rare enough. Once more, from I how felt upon waking, it wasn’t a bad dream, it was a dreamContinue reading “A Lifetime’s Worth of Staring at Train Announcement Boards”

The land that noise forgot (edit of 2016 text)

As I begin my ascent up to the tops, I try to break free of my cyclical doings on the foothills, too close to the claustrophobic wrapping of the weekend – an intense atmosphere where I exercise the very best and worst in me. New depths of contempt and idealist manifestos crisscross in my thoughts,Continue reading “The land that noise forgot (edit of 2016 text)”

I stare at bus stops, and it brings me home.

Late November 2003 I’m losing weight again. I’m ‘winning’ though, I tell myself. I’m successfully skirting the impurity of life. Regulating food intake, regulating exercise, regulated hard work and regulated social interactions. “Never get too close” from where the flesh would expose its foolish core, and be tainted in another’s eyes in tones one doesn’tContinue reading “I stare at bus stops, and it brings me home.”

Uncountable train journeys to Nowhere

The existential predicament of trying to get somewhere but never getting anywhere defines my adult life, but, by extension, my inability to actually arrive in adulthood. It’s a small story, based on a small measure of freedom to act in ways that I deemed would get me there, against a background of big big stories;Continue reading “Uncountable train journeys to Nowhere”

What to do? In this city, in this world

Edited version of text originally posted in Autumn 2016. I got the express train across the pennines. I’ve always wanted to reach the Metropolis on the other side, only to repeatedly realise it’s no lost world, no place where things are done differently, after all. “What spurs me on to travel to other towns andContinue reading “What to do? In this city, in this world”